We all need to stop having conversations like this:
“I’m so busy” said person A. “Oh my gosh… I’m SO busy too.” said person B. *Both thinks to self* I’m probably WAY busier than you.
Seriously, since when did busy-ness levels = better/smarter/more successful?
We can’t pin point the exact date but all we can say from personal experience and conversations we have… that the word ‘busy’ gets thrown around A LOT!
Like a lot a lot.
We’ll catch up with friends and people ‘in the biz’ and ask them how they’ve been and it goes straight to the busy talk… and then it ends with the busy talk!
We walk away wondering… is that it? Is busy… IT?
We don’t wanna know how busy you are, we genuinely want to know how you’ve been, what you’ve been doing and how much fun you’ve been having. Got it?
Who is guilty of the busy talk? Ahhh… WE ARE! Especially when we’re working on Make Life Merry! But we’re training ourselves to get out of this crappy habit and we’re gonna help you shake it too with these easy convo switches.
Question: how are you?
Answer: good… SO busy.
Ok. Let’s delve deeper in to this question. The person who asked ‘how are you?’ isn’t asking how busy you’ve been. Tell them how you are! Like what you are feeling right that moment. Or what you’ve been feeling lately. Has something epic happened? Are you feeling excited? Happy? Amazing? Or maybe you’ve been going through a rough patch. If you’re comfortable with the question asker, tell them why. They probably care about you and can offer support.
Question: what have you been up to?
Answer: hmm, what have I been doing? Oh, um, I dunno… I’ve just been SO busy.
We think this answer just comes out because the person answering the question gets in a fluster and probably, actually can’t remember what they’ve been up to. Our advice, take a deep breath and think about the project you’ve been working on, or something really good that’s happened to you personally. The question asker doesn’t mind if you take a few seconds to actually think about your answer. Then share what you’ve been up to! Surely your life isn’t just busy.
If you’re the question asker and you’re sick of getting the busy answer then change up your questions… don’t leave them so open ended. Keep your questions specific, this way the question answerer will need to think more and tell you much more exciting stuff than “I’ve been good… busy.”
Ask questions like:
What did you do yesterday/weekend/Monday etc.?
How are you feeling about work/boyfriend/other life detail at the moment?
What project is next for you?
What else do you have coming up?
How’s your cat?
These questions aren’t open to a busy answer. The answerer has to stop, think about specific life stuff and then answer you! It makes for a much better conversation and actual connection.
Even if you just start by bringing your awareness to the busy issue. We bet you’ll start to notice it happening everywhere, then you’ll wanna act quick smart in making these super easy convo switches.
Let us know how you go! Leave us a comment!
Emma + Carla
Images from Negative Space, Kaboom and Tookapic