“The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. Do not misunderstand me, danger is very real, but fear is a choice.” – Will Smith.
Sometimes we like to remind ourselves that the feeling of fear is pretty close to the feeling of excitement. You can decide to label it as fear/nerves/I shouldn’t go that way OR you can decide to label it as excited/this is new/I can’t wait to see what happens.
So far, what we know to be true, is that fear is there.
It’s a feeling that is pretty present in all of our lives. But when you stop and REALLY, truly think about the things that scare you (we’re not talking real danger here like lions, tigers and bears oh my), the things aren’t real.
The things we’re most afraid of live in a world that is yet to exist. They always live in the FUTURE.
Fear of going TO the job interview. You’re not there yet but you’re afraid you might say something dumb/stupid. You think about it and think about it until you’re there (or maybe you didn’t make it there because of the made up fear), and then you feel nervous… but then you go into the interview, you do your best, maybe you shine, maybe you stuff up a sentence but nothing too terrible happened.
You did it yay.
But how much did the fear impact the rest of your life the week (or month or year even!) beforehand?
Something to think about. Something to ponder. Where is fear necessary and where is it not? Where can we use fear as a tool to move forward, to create motivation but where are we using it as a tool to hold us back?
The main fear we hear most about all comes down to fear of judgement (from others and also ourselves).
It’s this made up feeling of not being good enough, not reaching our potential, of falling over or failing at something.
How will we be perceived IF xyz happens? What will THEY think. What will THEY say.
I’ll be a failure. I’ll look so dumb. I’ll never make it. I can’t do that.
If we can stop our mind chatter for a moment, we soon realise that the ONLY way we can fail is if we choose to see it as a fail.
We rather choose to see our ‘failings’ as lessons or just temporary defeat (thank you Napoleon Hill for that one).
So really, fear is fake. It’s not real. BUT if it is real for you, like it is for us, and every other human (because feelings are real), then we must choose to use it and see it as something that can move us to a place where the fear doesn’t exist, even for just a moment. And then…repeat
Emma + Carla