In a world amplified by social media, it’s easy to experience self-comparison on overdrive. We’ve been talking about this topic since the beginning of The Merrymaker Sisters back in 2012. However, with the mass adoption of social media, it’s more important than ever to check in with your self-comparison habits.
One scroll on Instagram and you see the highlight reels of everyone’s lives. Sure many are sharing more authentic stuff (the ups and downs of life), and it’s great to see more independent media accounts and all the dog content… but still, there are a lot of highlights and advertisements. Some of those ads are obvious and others not. Influencers share how to get the body with “this product”, most likely getting paid to promote. We have been there, and it felt yuck so we quit the business.
If you lack awareness, you will begin to measure your life against the perfect relationships and families… who are dressed in perfect outfits… living in amazing houses… who have even better holidays. If you spend too much time looking at these people’s lives, not only do you measure your life against the fragmented picture you have of theirs, but you also forget to live your own!
Gosh, I could rant on this forever… about how big renovated homes do not equate to instant happiness. How studies show that anyone who posts often about their perfect relationship is usually either compensating or, as I have come to notice, are doing it for traction (for an ego boost or business perhaps). And with all the new reports done on the many issues with kids being on social media… for me, this is terrifying (even though I love seeing all the cute babies and kids… I don’t know if it’s the smartest thing to do, no shame on you if you choose to do this. I simply find it a little concerning).
Whether it’s comparing your achievements, lifestyle or personal milestones to others, or comparing yourself to a past version of you or perfect version of yourself, this habit can be a huge cause of anxiety and unhappiness. The great thing is that there are simple strategies you can start right away to quiet down your self-comparison habit. These practices will help you step towards more joy and a deeper sense of satisfaction with life.
Simple Strategies to Overcome Self-Comparison
It’s not rocket science! Use these simple steps to stop comparing yourself!
Focus on Personal Growth
Redirect the energy spent on comparing yourself to others towards your own goals and aspirations. Sign up to the course, step outside your comfort zone and set personal benchmarks. Keyword, personal, don’t catch other people’s goals and aspirations. If you are not sure what you want to focus on, then make that your goal, go figure out what your goals and true desires are.
Feel Gratitude
Practise gratitude for where you are in your journey. If you are terrible at this, write it down! Every evening before you go to bed write 3 dot points of gratitude. This practice changed our lives. It helps you shift focus from what you (perceive you) lack to all that you have.
Practise Self-acceptance and Contentment
Embrace who you are and where you’re at. It’s not about settling, but more about finding peace in your own journey. This mindset helps you focus on your path without feeling the need to measure up to others. We practise this mindset with our Pilates, Yoga and meditation. If you’d like to start, sign up to a free week of MerryBody. The key difference with MerryBody is that it’s intentionally created with self-acceptance, it’s filtered into every class. If you struggle with self-comparison and lack confidence, MerryBody is an amazing tool. The daily classes will remind you that you are amazing, just as you are, right here and right now.
Limit Social Media (but, actually do it)
It is a huge catalyst for self-comparison. Limiting your time on these platforms can help reduce the urge to compare your life. Put limits on yourself (we need to do it too!).
Empathetic Joy, be happy for others!
Instead of viewing others’ successes as a benchmark for what you lack, try to be happy for them! Celebrate their achievements genuinely. This mindset will not only bring more joy to you but it will also foster friendships and community. Bring your awareness to your actions the next time someone shares good news, notice how you react (don’t judge yourself), make a change if you need.
Alright! If you’re ready to overcome your self-comparison, choose one of the above strategies today. All change begins with one tiny step.
Always merrymaking,
Emma + Carla